More Immutable Rules of Work
- After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.
- Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he/she is supposed to be doing.
- At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying.
- Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
- If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
- If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
- It doesn't matter what you do, it only matters what you say you've done and what you're going to do.
- When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
- You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
- Never delay the ending of a meeting.
- The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
- You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops by your desk.
- No matter how many rules are written for or about a procedure or event, someone will always add at least one more after the list is posted. (For example, see the comments below.)
4 comments:
"At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying."
Unless you're dealing with absent minded PHDs... :-)
NFO, I have a building full of doctors - mostly the M.D. type - but a couple of them are PhDs, too. They mostly suffer from "MDeity", and let others do the carrying for them.
•Never delay the ending of a meeting.
•The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
Should you do the former, be prepared to reap the latter form your coworkers.
That clipboard trick has been used in many a movie/TV show to gain access to supposedly closed venues.
Excellent list!
Thanks, joated. I first learned the clipboard trick while in the Navy, and it worked Every. Single. Time. :)
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