Hard to pick a winner here... BRAINS OF BRITAIN
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
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Jeremy Paxman:
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What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers' ?
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Contestant:
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Homosexuals.
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Jeremy Paxman:
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No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.
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BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2) | |
Jamie Theakston:
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Where do you think Cambridge University is ?
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Contestant:
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Geography isn't my strong point.
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Jamie Theakston:
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There's a clue in the title.
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Contestant:
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Leicester.
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BBC NORFOLK | |
Stewart White:
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Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World ?
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Contestant:
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I don't know.
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Stewart White:
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I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow ?
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Contestant:
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Arm
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Stewart White:
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Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
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Contestant:
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Strong.
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Stewart White:
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Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name ?
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Contestant:
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Louis
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Stewart White:
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Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World ?
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Contestant:
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Frank Sinatra ?
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LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )
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Alex Trelinski:
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What is the capital of Italy ?
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Contestant:
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France.
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Trelinski:
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France is another country. Try again.
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Contestant:
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Oh, um, Benidorm.
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Trelinski:
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Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon ?
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Contestant:
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Sorry, I don't know.
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Trelinski:
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Just guess a country then.
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Contestant:
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Paris.
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THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
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Anne Robinson:
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Oscar
Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about
their experiences in what: - Prison, or the Conservative Party ?
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Contestant:
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The Conservative Party.
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BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )
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DJ Mark:
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For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope ?
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Ruth from Rowley Regis:
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I think I know that one.. Is it Jewish ?
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UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
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Bamber Gascoyne:
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What was Gandhi's first name ?
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Contestant:
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Goosey ?
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GWR FM ( Bristol )
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Presenter:
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What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963 ?
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Contestant:
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I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.
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PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO ? MANCHESTER )
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Phil:
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What's 11 squared ?
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Contestant:
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I don't know.
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Phil:
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I'll give you a clue It's two ones with a two in the middle.
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Contestant:
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Is it five ?
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RICHARD AND JUDY
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Richard:
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Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman ?
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Contestant:
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Forrest Gump.
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RICHARD AND JUDY
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Richard:
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On which street did Sherlock Holmes live ?
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Contestant:
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Er. ... ...
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Richard:
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He makes bread . .. ..
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Contestant:
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Er .. ......
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Richard:
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He makes cakes . .. ..
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Contestant:
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Kipling Street ?
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LINCS FM PHONE-IN
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Presenter:
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Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world ?
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Contestant:
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Barcelona.
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Presenter:
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I was really after the name of a country.
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Contestant:
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I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.
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NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
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Question:
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What is the world's largest continent ?
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Contestant:
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The Pacific.
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ROCK FM ( PRESTON )
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Presenter:
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Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci
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Contestant:
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Who Framed Roger Rabbit ?
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THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
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Steve Le Fevre:
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What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
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Contestant:
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Magna Carta ?
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JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
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James O'Brien:
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How many kings of England have been called Henry ?
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Contestant:
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Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... ER. ER ... Three ?
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CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL ) | |
Chris Searle:
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In which European country is Mount Etna ?
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Caller:
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Japan.
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Chris Searle:
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I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
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Caller:
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Er ........ Mexico ?
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PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )
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Paul Wappat:
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How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last ?
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Contestant (long pause):
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Fourteen days.
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DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
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Daryl Denham:
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In which country would you spend shekels ?
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Contestant:
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Holland ?
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Daryl Denham:
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Try the next letter of the alphabet.
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Contestant:
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Iceland? Ireland ?
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Daryl Denham: (helpfully)
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It's a bad line. Did you say Israel ?
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Contestant:
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No.
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PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
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Phil Wood:
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What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible ?
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Contestant:
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Er... .... ...
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Phil Wood:
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It's got two syllables .. .. . Kor . .
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Contestant:
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Blimey ?
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Phil Wood:
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Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . . .
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Contestant:
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(Silence)
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Phil Wood:
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OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
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Contestant:
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Walked ?
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THE VAULT
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Melanie Sykes:
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What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time ?
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Contestant:
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Nostalgia.
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LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB) | |
Presenter:
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What religion was Guy Fawkes ?
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Contestant:
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Jewish.
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Presenter:
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That's close enough.
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STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
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Wright:
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Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play ?
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Contestant:
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Jesus.
h/t AJDShootist |
10 comments:
Why, yes, I am laughing out loud now. How did you guess. rofl!
Too funny! :-)
You're making this up.
Please.
What a great way to start the day - thanks for a good laugh! Who is buried in Grant's tomb? (Sorry, couldn't resist)
Great to see we don't hold the market on stupid!
gfa
I didn't know whether to be glad that we don't have a unique license on uneducated citizens, or sad because Brits are apparently as ignorant as US folks.
Both, it seems. You're welcome, everyone. :)
It's hard to believe these are real answers by real people and not a Monty Python skit of some kind.
I agree, joated. But since the quotes give sources, it's entirely possible.
Wow. Although that nostalgia answer was kinda close :)
It is close, isn't it? :)
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