18 February 2015

Hump Day: It's Blotter Time!

Criminal Mischief ~ An intoxicated [man], 29 yoa, was arrested on charges of Disorderly Conduct and Criminal Mischief after he broke the door to a stateroom, elbowed one man in the chest and attempted to punch another on board the processing vessel Gordon Jenson.

Motor Vehicle Damage ~ A truck was blown off a hillside and into a homeowner’s yard, where it high-centered itself.
I told you it gets windy in the Aleutians.

Welfare Check ~ Caller reported two males carrying an unconscious female into the hotel, and asked that officers check into the situation. Officers found the three in the hotel parking lot, where the woman could be seen laughing loudly just before falling on her face. Officers determined that the woman was not in any danger from the men, one of whom was her boyfriend and agreed to take her home for the evening.
She might not have been in danger from the men, but was definitely in danger from her own behavior.

Suspicious Person/Activity ~ Caller reported a group of 5 children playing atop an old residence. Officer contacted the group and advised them not to play on the roof of residences in general and not to play on the roof of residences not their own, ever.
And just when they were getting UP in the world...

Animal ~ Homeowner complained, again, about a neighbor's dog leaving enormous piles of poop in her yard.

Theft ~ A thief who left his old shoes in an apparent trade for a new pair was found waiting for a flight at the airport. [He], 37 yoa, was cited for Theft III and his new, and only, pair of shoes was seized.

Assault ~ A heated argument between a bar employee and an intoxicated bar patron, regarding the patron's sexual orientation and dress, resulted in the patron climbing into a bathroom stall and shoving the employee's head in a toilet.
I think that might be a bit beyond an "argument".

Suspicious Person/Activity ~ Officers responded to the Small Boat Harbor regarding a report that a large man was beating on a small lock, attempting to gain entry to a sailboat. The large man was gone by the time police arrived, but the drunken man who was inside the vessel making unpleasant remarks about the officers eventually came outside and was taken home by his mother.
Not the smartest move on the "drunken man's" part, eh?


ProudHillbilly said...

Since cold weather keeps the smell down, homeowner should save the poop and then return it to the dog owner all at once.

Rev. Paul said...

Ya know, PH, that's not a bad idea. :)

Old NFO said...

They either need a bigger jail, or less booze up there...

Chickenmom said...

Good thing that neighbor doesn't own a cow!

Rev. Paul said...

NFO, I suspect their drunk tank is in almost constant use.

Chickenmom, I hadn't thought of that. :)

Brigid said...

Those made me laugh. I still have a little clipping from the town where my Indiana home was at. "Residential Burglary - theft of unknown number of jars of homemade gravy".

Rev. Paul said...

Brigid, I'm glad you liked it. But clearly that gravy theft report is incomplete: any canner worth his or her salt would know exactly how many quarts and pints were left on the shelf. :)