Police Blotter: "Please Don't Mention Us"

Traffic Crime
Officers contacted the occupants of a vehicle whose driver appeared to be having great difficulty manipulating various controls and signals. The driver admitted to being only recently licensed, but did not appear to be otherwise impaired.

Trespass
Officers responded to a fishing vessel regarding a recently terminated employee who was dragging his heels about packing his gear and leaving the vessel. The ex-employee sped up, marginally, after officers arrived on scene and was eventually escorted to the dock.

Welfare Check
Caller reported an intoxicated man dancing near City Dock and expressed concerned that he might fall in the water. An officer contacted the man, who was jamming to his music, and advised him of the concern. The man apologized for having too much fun. 

Drunk Disturbance
Library staff reported an unruly and intoxicated patron refused to leave the premises. An officer contacted the suspect, who had just left the building, and advised him he would be arrested if he returned to the facility this night.

Assault
Security officers reported an employee had been “jumped” and had complained of back pain shortly before he collapsed. Responding officers restrained the patient, who was combative and uncooperative with EMS personnel, and attempted to ascertain the details of his alleged assault. The patient refused to provide any information about his attackers, except to say they were part of the Mexican Mafia. 

Suspicious Person/Activity
An officer responded to the Dutch Harbor Post Office regarding a complaint about a bike rider periodically getting off his bicycle and dancing in the middle of the roadway. The suspect, who appeared somewhat intoxicated, told the officer he needed to urinate and was advised that urinating in public was a violation of City ordinance.

Suspicious Person/Activity
The man who had told an officer he really needed to urinate did in fact do so a short time later… in the Post Office lobby. Postal employees noted that the mess was disgusting and inconvenient, as the man had simply peed in his pants and down his legs rather than exposing himself.

Traffic Roads
Caller reported two drivers stopped front to rear, essentially blocking Dutton Road at Broadway. An officer advised the two drivers of the complaint and they quickly departed after expressing mild dismay at the thought of being mentioned in the police blotter.