30 November 2017

Flashback: Police Blotter

Since the Unalaska/Dutch Harbor Dept. of Public Safety hasn't started the Blotter back up (yet), here are some goodies from the past.

DUI
An extremely intoxicated woman claimed that a young man was driving drunk, headed towards Standard Oil Hill. Officers quickly found the alleged suspect, who appeared sober and said he had not consumed alcohol since the previous evening. His performance on field sobriety tests supported this claim.

Suspicious Person/Activity
Officer advised an inebriate urinating between two cars that restrooms were the facility of choice for said activity.

Assistance Rendered
Local resident got upset when he found a naked man inside his mom’s room. He yelled at the naked man and told him to leave the house. The mother soon returned and asked that her son be made to leave the residence for the evening.  Officers advised that they could not force the son to leave the residence as he lived there and no crime had been committed.

Per a court martial ruling in the early 1970s, when an Air Force crewman had been observed nude, while chasing an equally unclothed female down a hotel hallway: "No service member shall be considered out of uniform while dressed appropriately for the activity in which he is engaged."

Assault
A man whose family had been obscenely disparaged on Facebook came to the police station to report that he had just come from the suspect’s home, where he had punched the suspect several times in the face. The suspect, who exhibited minor facial injuries, did not wish to speak to police about the matter and had no interest in pursuing charges.

MVA Damage
A taxi driver attempting to smoke and drive shortly after waking drove into a small ditch near the Bobby Storrs Small Boat Harbor. Damages were minor and no injuries were reported.

I've heard of people who couldn't walk and chew gum, but this is a new one ...

Suspicious Person/Activity
Drunken brother reported being concerned because his drunken sibling had grabbed five beers and departed their house in a taxi. The responding officer found nothing unusual about this incident.

DUI
An officer stopped a woman dressed as a cat after observing her drive her vehicle in the wrong lane of travel and determined she was been drinking. [The woman], 31 yoa, was arrested for Driving Under the Influence.

Nothing I could add would be as funny as the report. :^)

2 comments:

Old NFO said...

Sigh... Those were a bright spot, and VERY well done!

Rev. Paul said...

True enough, my friend. We all miss it a lot.